Friday, May 29, 2009

Mirror, Mirror on the Wall...

I talked yesterday about blogger giving me fits with not keeping the posts current and now there is another problem. Or at least I think it's blogger. For some reason I can't view Sandy's "A working Mom's joy" or CYa Girl. Every time I try to read their posts I get an error. Is that happening to anyone else?

I keep looking at the forecast every morning to see if it will be conducive to mowing that day and it looks like it will be Sunday or Monday now. Then this morning as I was setting on the throne it dawned on me that my mower isn't in working order right now. The bent blade is in the back of my car and I had totally forgotten about it. So, if I'm going to get out there and cut that high grass I'd better head to the hardware store today and get that blade.

"Weight loss is relative." By this I mean...I've lost 70 pounds and when I started on maintenance I felt that I looked pretty durn good. And all my friends and relatives were calling me skinny and such. But now that I've been on maintenance for a few months I feel and look fat again. I can remember looking at my legs a few months ago and thinking, "Wow, they are skinny." Now not so much. So, what to do? Do I go off maintenance for a while and get more of this fat off or do I just accept myself as I am? I started out at 250 and have gotten down to 180. At 5' 4" that is still obese, but a lot healthier than at 250. When I started this weight loss/healthier me program I had 150 in mind for my goal. Then when I stalled at 180 and became obsessed with food and so miserable I decided to stop there. But now I don't know what to do. If I get down to 150 will I look at myself again in a few months and have the same thoughts? Will this turn into an eating disorder? That kinda scares me. What are your thoughts?

Have a great weekend!

14 comments:

VRaz60 said...

Can you still aim for 150 without becoming obsessive? Just watch your food, exercise and be sensible. But if trying to reach 150 makes you unhappy, I'd say learn to love yourself at any weight. Just knowing a tiny bit about you from your blog, I'd say you were a wonderful person, who, at any weight would be a joy to know. 30# is just a number. You are healthier now, and that is a huge accomplishment. Just continue to take care of yourself.

VeeGettingHealthy said...

You've done great. Could you modify your maintenance plan to be maybe a few calories less, or increase your exercise by say 10 minutes a day?

Enjoy that you have had such a wonderful success. You have proved to yourself that you can accomplish anything. Be happy now.

Vee at www.veegettinghealthy.blogspot.com

Cammy said...

Can't help with the blog issue. I was able to get to both of them. ::is puzzled::I don't want to worry you, but our minds are traveling the same path with respect to relativity of weight loss. As I was walking across a room yesterday, for some reason I looked down at my thighs and thought, "Hmm, I look the same size as I did before." Now, you and I KNOW a person can't go from a size 22 to a 6 and not look different, the same as a person can't lose a whopping 70 pounds without looking "durn good." I think our size self-perception might be skewed. :)

I didn't know you pre-weight loss, but for what it's worth, I think you look great just the way you are. I understand wanting to possibly lose more, but I'd base it on how you *feel* rather than the scale or the clothing tags.

My $.02, but always free to you.

Have a great weekend!

fatty McButter Pants said...

I am afraid no matter what my size, that I am still going to have a body IMAGE problem. I never see myself as fat when I am fat, or thin when I was thin.

Try to enjoy your major accomplishment. Maybe set a health goal instead of a weight loss goal. Just a thought.

Good luck with blogger. I couldn't get my blog list to show up yesterday.

SeaShore said...

I was having that error message pop up with various blogs over the last week. Sometimes if I clicked okay on the message, rather than closing the window, the blog would come up. Sometimes not. I haven't had it happen for 2 days though.

I have a self perception problem, too. I always have, and I think it's lead to my regains in the past. I can't really see the difference in me from 186 to 263. It's the reason why I kept a pair of pants from 263 and put them on every so often. That's very telling!

Only you can answer what your goal weight should be. For me it will be something that I can comfortably maintain. I know if I go too low in calories I won't stick to it. I may not be in that perfect BMI range at my goal, but at least I will be much healthier than before.

Maybe you just needed a maintaining break? You could always try losing again, and if it got too obsessive, go back to maintenance. Just don't allow one form of health (mental) to suffer for the benefit of another (physical).

Hanlie said...

This is a very personal thing, but since you asked I'll give you my opinion... If you're still obese, you should slim down some more for your own good. I think you know deep down that you're not done yet, which is why you look fat to yourself. I don't think you're heading for an eating disorder. I think that the break you took was a good thing and that you probably needed it, but that you're sort of ready to move on to the next phase. It really is ultimately about taking care of yourself, and listening to your body.

grammy said...

Everyone gave such good advice. It is how you feel that counts. Even if you just lost one pound a month... that still adds up. The important thing is to keep moving and not to add unhealthy food and choices into your regular routine. I find it helps me not to worry about the occasional splurge... just get back to work after that. (o:

Jen said...

I think you should try to aim for 150, using the same methods and techniques that you did to get to 180. If you find that you get to a certain point and the weight just isn't coming off anymore (whether that's 180, 170...whatever), I think you need to evaluate what is better for your health and well being. You don't want to spend 24/7 thinking about food and weight loss just to lose a few more pounds....but you also don't want to sacrifice your overall health because you're worried about becoming obsessive. It's all about finding a happy medium.

jinxxxygirl said...

Wow! I so understand what you are saying. First of all yes i'am having that same problem with blogger on one blog i cannot open.

I too started at 250 and got miserably stuck at 180 for like 4 months then just as i had begun to lose hope i lost 2.5 one month and 5 pounds the next month. Now i lost .5 last month and don't expect to lose much this month when i weigh in Sunday. Its easy to get frustrated.
I see a different view of myself in the mirror almost every day . And it all revolves around my mentality. Its wierd. It really revolves around my mood and if i've done well eating and exercising or not. Even though the scale may not change i will view myself as heavier looking in the mirror if i have not behaved. SO since i obviously cannot trust my vision i've been trying lately to go more by how i FEEL rather than what i see in the mirror.
Are you still getting input from your friends and relatives? Are they still calling you skinny and such???If not maybe because you don't have that in put to reinforce how good you look you are seeing yourself as heavier. I know i always get a good pick me up and view myself as looking good in the mirror after i've had a compliment. Ofcourse the longer we are at our lower weight the fewer the compliments will be and we have to find a way to deal with that.
I've been stuck at 170 - 172 for a while and flirted with the idea of just staying here. But i know i'm not happy. I want less of a belly and smaller upper arms. So i'm just gonna keep plugging away. Keep working at it. After all its a lifetime program. Lose a pound here and there and maybe eventually i'll get down where i want to be. The scale just cannot go up! By the way i'm 5'7". You gotta do what makes YOU happy. You have room to lose more if thats what you want to do. Or stay the same. Like you said its definately better than 250. Girl! You rock! Jinx!

Terri said...

This could be that point that everyone thinks the need to lose weight. I know when I was younger and weighed 125, I thought I needed to lose weight. My sister who used to weight 330 lbs and lost weight and weighs 155 thinks she needs to lose weight. I think it's our perspective of ourselves. I agree is VR-try to aim for your goal but do it at a leisure pace, try not to get obsessive about it (like we all do when we are trying to lose weight). And while trying to get to your goad, enjoy what you've accomplished. Good luck!

JC said...

I think it is your body's way of telling you that it is ready to lose those last 30 lbs. I would not worry at all about becoming obsessed with it. I don't know how tall you are by 150 sounds reasonable to me.

I have the same issue with blogger that you posted earlier. I've noticed that I can't get certain blogs at work but can get them when I'm home. I haven't tried the two you mentioned.

Have a great rest of the weekend.

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Lisa said...

Congrats on your 70 lb weight loss!

- lisa
www.losewithlisa.blogspot.com